Oh, no, I thought as I approached the checkout lane. It’s the grumpy Makro lady again. Makro is a “cash and carry” grocery chain here in Thailand, where we can buy items at wholesale prices. I shop there about once a week for things like chicken, pasta, snacks, paper products, etc.
I had first noticed my grumpy Makro lady about 6 months ago. Unlike the other cashiers, who would smile and chit-chat with me as I paid for my groceries, this woman stolidly grunted a syllable and then handed me the receipt in response to my attempt at initiating conversation.
The one time she did say more, I wished she hadn’t.
“You’ve got a ton of stuff,” she said to me in a critical tone.
I answered, in slight shock, as generally speaking, the Thai are some of the most courteous people I’ve ever met: “Well… we’re about to go on a trip, so I’m making sure we have enough.”
“Where are you going?” the Grumpy Makro lady demanded.
“Prajuab,” I answered (thinking that we’re maybe finally going to break through into a friendly conversation).
But the Grumpy Makro lady replied, with derision: “There’s a Makro in Prajuab. You could have bought these things there.”
I stood there, attempting a smile, unable to think of a single thing to say. I had fumed the whole way to my car. I can’t believe she was rude enough to tell me I should have bought my groceries somewhere else!
But to return to last week’s incident – one of the reasons I really couldn’t believe that my cashier was going to be the grumpy Makro lady, was that I had recently been challenged about the way I was using my “wait time” in the queue. I had read a book out loud with my girls: My Tech-wise Life: Growing Up and Making Choices in a World of Devices. I had been convicted about my habit of using the time in grocery lines to check email, read the news, and respond to messages. “Twenty years ago,” I had told my girls, “I used to spend that time praying for the cashier and the customers surrounding me. I think I just didn’t notice when I replaced that habit with using my phone.” I had decided on an action step of returning to prayer, instead of device usage, when I was in line. And now I had to pray for my grumpy Makro lady!
I began to feel my heart soften as I prayed for her unknown-to-me hurts, and for her salvation.
To my surprise, as I scanned the QR code for automatic bank transfer, my cashier sighed, “Oh, I’m so, so tired today.”
The question rose, as if put there by another, to my lips: “Did you wake up early today?”
“Four o’clock in the morning,” the Makro lady replied.
I answered, instinctively, somehow (!(Holy Spirit)!) knowing it was the right question, and what the answer would be: “Were you worried about something?”
“My child is sick,” the Makro lady shared.
“I’m so sorry to hear that. How old is your child?” I asked.
“He’s 11 years old.”
“What is he sick with?”
“He got sunstroke. He’ll be okay … he’s been to see the doctor. But he lives upcountry. I can’t go to see him. It’s hard. And there are many other issues as well.”
I felt rather speechless once again, but this time because of this sudden window into her life, which had opened my understanding about why she is perennially grumpy. I fumbled out, “I’m sorry things are hard. Of course you are worried about your child. I hope that things get better soon.”
I had to move on, as another customer was now waiting for checkout. I wonder how many employees there have moved to Bangkok specifically for work, and are living apart from their children, I thought as I wheeled the grocery cart to my car. I knew this was a common occurrence, but I had never thought about its maybe being the reason for my grumpy Makro lady’s tense, upset face.
Sadness – and shame – washed over me as I loaded lettuce and paper towels into my trunk. Sadness for my cashier and all the others who are currently separated from their children for work reasons.
Shame that I had allowed myself to be so easily offended by her cryptic remarks, and that I had labeled her “the grumpy Makro lady.” Why had I not had eyes to see her as a wounded human being, “distressed and dispirited because she was like a sheep without a shepherd”? (Matthew 9:36, NASB)
I was also feeling amazed, though. Look what happened because I made a choice to pray instead of use my phone!
Pray for the missionaries you support. Just like you, we are on our paths of sanctification, and we still need the Holy Spirit’s help in a lot of areas! Pray for Proverbs 19:11 in our lives: “Good sense makes one slow to anger, and it is his glory to overlook an offense.”
